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These parties were also a great way to meet other hot young gay guys: possible hook-ups, possible relationships, possible friends. If you are young and grew up with modest means, it’s plain ol’ exciting to splash around in a pool on the edge of a cliff high up in the Hollywood Hills, looking down at the glitter of the city lights below. For most of the young men there, the truth is much simpler and much more mundane: being at big opulent parties is fun. It’s wrong to paint them as merely filled with a craven desire to be around money and people who might give them a shot at stardom. Some of the young men at these parties are starkly ambitious, but most of them are not. The clever ones learn right away whose names are worth knowing and which parties are the “right parties” to be invited to.
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The young men who get invited to these parties, no matter how down-to-earth their background, get swept up pretty quickly. Los Angeles in general, and the entertainment industry in particular, is known for its “who do you know, and what can you do for me?” culture. This wide-eyed innocence doesn’t last long, of course. He was surrounded by gay men who were successful and attractive, people whom he could look at and say: “I want to be like that.” Most likely it was a combination of all of these things.īut there was more to it than the flash and glitz of Hollywood chic: having grown up in a small town, with a small town mentality, this may very well have been the first time he had ever felt that being a gay man could mean something more than being discriminated against and existing on the margins. Or it might have been the first time he was introduced to a director, two producers, and the president of a major television network all in the same night. It also may have been the first time he was in a home that was worth nearly ten million dollars. That alone could have been reason for his wide eyes and feeling of awe.
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Maybe this was the first time he had ever seen an entire house packed full of gorgeous young gay men. But I had a few of the “right friends,” which always opens doors in Los Angeles.īack to Midwest Guy. I was actually somewhat out of place: at the age of 27, I was very close to the in-between “no-man’s land” demographic rarely invited to these events. Looking around the party, almost everybody you saw could be easily placed into one of two groups: very young men who were ridiculously attractive in a very polished, tanned, lean, high-cheekboned Hollywood way and older men who were absurdly wealthy, many of them also very powerful in some part of the entertainment industry.
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I smiled, imagining what in particular he might be talking about. It might have been Ohio, or perhaps Minnesota the details don’t matter, since this story isn’t really about him. He was from a small town in a midwest state. He was around 20 years old, awkwardly holding a wine glass, and this was his first big gay Hollywood party. The young man stood across from me in the small, perfectly manicured yard of a decadent home that hugged slopes of Hollywood Hills. If I’d known that being gay could mean this, I would have come out a lot sooner.